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Why We Stay in Bad Jobs Too Long
The covid-19 pandemic raised big questions about the way we live and work. Amidst the turmoil, we’re wise to take a fresh look at our work and consider whether changes are in order. The “Great Resignation” demonstrated that many of us have been dissatisfied with our jobs, with millions quitting each month. The trend looks set to continue, especially among younger workers. According to a 2022 LinkedIn study of more than 20,000 U.S. workers, 25% of Gen Zers and 23% of Millennials reported hoping or planning to leave their current employers within the next six months. Many have fallen into
The Problem with Lack of Focus—And How to Fix It
Article Summary: These days, we’re bombarded with digital distractions, and it’s detracting from our ability to get things done, our leadership effectiveness, and our quality of life. This article notes 15 of the most important benefits of focus and provides 24 actionable strategies for developing and maintaining our focus. “Things which matter most must never be at the mercy of things which matter least.” -Johann Wolfgang von Goethe These days it feels like the world is dead-set against our having focus. We’re bombarded with digital distractions. There are near-constant requests for our attention, many driven by algorithms that have cracked
The Trap of Bad Habits–And How to Break Them
We go through life assuming we’re in the driver’s seat but often there are other important influences driving our actions. One of them is habits–the things we do often and regularly, sometimes without knowing that we’re doing them. The function of habit learning occurs in the basal ganglia, a group of subcortical nuclei in our brains. A Duke University researcher estimated that more than 40 percent of the actions we take each day are based on habits, not decisions. Our brains consume a tremendous amount of energy, so we’re wired to preserve that energy whenever possible. If we can avoid
The Trap of Dissatisfaction–And Its Surprising Upside
“I can’t get no satisfaction.” -The Rolling Stones We all go through hard times in life, with setbacks and disappointments. It only becomes a trap if we experience a chronic sense of dissatisfaction—not being content or at peace with what we have. It’s a trap if we develop an enduring sense of disappointment, of never feeling at peace. Or a chronic craving or dwelling on things we lack. In this state, we’re missing a sense of acceptance, of contentment, of serenity. Such dissatisfaction can be a sign of maladaptive perfectionism—when our personal performance standards are hopelessly high and we’re extremely
How to Discover Your Core Values
Our values are what we consider most important in life—what’s most worthy and valuable to us. Values can also be beliefs, moral principles, or standards of behavior (e.g., commitments for how we will treat each other). In other words, what we believe and stand for. Our values should guide our choices and behavior, helping us determine how to act in various situations. What to pursue and defend. And what not to. “Values are basic and fundamental beliefs that guide or motivate attitudes or actions. They help us to determine what is important to us. Values describe the personal qualities we
How to Be More Decisive in Your Life and Leadership
“Should I stay or should I go?” -the Clash We make many decisions every day. Many are trivial, but some are consequential and taxing. Which career to pursue (or transition into). When to make a big move. Who to live with, work with, or hire. Whether to start a new venture. To live and lead well, we must get good at making decisions. On the leadership front, do we want leaders who wallow and waffle? Or leaders who move forward despite uncertainty; home in quickly on the key issues; actively gather input before deciding; involve others in decisions; invoke their
How to Stop Catastrophizing–Managing Our Minds
“The sky has finally fallen. Always knew it would.” -Eeyore, from Winnie the Pooh Things have been tough in the last few years. Pandemic. Inflation. War. Many are suffering mightily. Maybe you’ve been suffering too. But are you complicit in your own suffering? Are you making things, as tough as they may be already, even worse? One of the ways we do this is through “catastrophizing.” Catastrophizing is a form of cognitive distortion, in which we assume the worst and blow things out of proportion. We imagine the worst possible outcome and generate an exceptionally negative expectation of future events.
How to Build Confidence in Yourself and Your Leadership
Confidence is an enigma for many of us. We know it can help us in many ways. And we hold it in high regard, knowing it can make a big difference. Yet we tend to view it as something innate–something some people have and others don’t. The truth is that, while some people have more of a disposition toward confidence than others, it’s something we can all build systematically. And we should. Why? When we’re confident, we have conviction that we can succeed. Contrary to what many people believe, confidence isn’t a fixed trait. We’re not either born with it
The Complacency Trap
One of the most insidious traps we can fall into in life and work is that of complacency—a state of easy contentment, with a lack of concern about or awareness of problems or risks. Complacency can prevent us from recognizing risks, trying harder, and making improvements. Examples abound. We can be complacent about our health—or the health of our loved ones. Or complacent about our relationships. About our work, team, leadership, or organization. Complacent about our democracy and planet. How to know when we’ve fallen into the complacency trap? 11 Signs of Complacency When we’re complacent, we: Take things
The Trap of Blaming Others
When things aren’t going your way, it may be tempting to deflect attention from your own role in things and blame others. Perhaps you’re blaming your spouse. Or boss. Perhaps you’re blaming a friend or colleague. Or the economy or inflation—or politicians, the media, or a rival political party. Your parents, or your circumstances. Blaming may give you a feeling of satisfaction as you look outside for responsibility and wallow in the unfairness of it all. But that feeling is fleeting. In the meantime, you haven’t moved forward at all. In fact, you’ve moved backward. “No good comes from blame.”
The Benefits of Systematic Personal Development
Personal development entails efforts to improve yourself—to develop your potential and capabilities. With systematic personal development, you can improve nearly all aspects of your life. “Personal development refers to activities that improve self-knowledge and identity, develop talents and potential, build human capital and employability, enhance quality of life, and contribute to the realization of dreams and aspirations.” -Bob Aubrey, Managing Your Aspirations You can also leverage personal development to address challenges in your life, such as: dullness and monotony in your days unfulfilled dreams and ambitions feeling stuck or uncertain about what’s next Personal development involves both inner and outer
What Are You Avoiding?
Avoidance. We all do it, whether it’s keeping away from someone or not doing something. What are you avoiding? Sometimes we change the subject when it drifts into awkward territory. Other times we talk around hard topics. Or we put off that tough task. Avoidance is a coping mechanism. Sometimes it’s helpful. Like when we see a downed power line or a snake. It’s an inheritance from our evolutionary biology. Our nervous system gives us powerful signals to avoid danger, thus increasing our chances of survival. Avoidance is natural. “Truly, there is nothing more common, routine, and human than avoiding
How to Choose a Co-Founder
When we think of entrepreneurship we tend to think of famous entrepreneurs. Elon. Steve Jobs. Oprah. Mark Zuckerberg. Richard Branson. Jack Ma. Sara Blakely. Can you think of any companies with co-founders? It’s more than you might think. Prominent Companies Started by Co-Founders Airbnb Alibaba Group Apple Baidu Ben & Jerry’s Birchbox DropBox Facebook Google Hewlett-Packard Infosys Instagram Intel Johnson & Johnson Microsoft Netflix PayPal Rent the Runway Skype Snapchat Sony Spotify Twitter YouTube The Myth of the Solo Entrepreneur We’re enamored with the myth of the solo entrepreneur, but in reality entrepreneurship is a team sport. Entrepreneurship
What Are Your Leadership Derailers?
Here’s the thing: we all want to be better leaders. But too often we focus on what to do as leaders while neglecting what not to do. That’s where leadership derailers come in—the things that take us off track and inhibit our leadership effectiveness. If we want to be good leaders, we must be aware of our derailers and begin working on them. “Most books about leadership tell us what a person ought to do to become effective and powerful. Few tell us what to avoid. But the latter may be even more valuable because many people on the road
Changing Careers? Avoid These Common Mistakes
Are you happy with your work? Do you love what you do, or at least enjoy it a fair amount of time? Do you often find yourself wondering, should I stay or should go? Many people have been asking these questions—even more so during the pandemic and its “Great Resignation”—and answering them with a job or career change. What are the most common career change mistakes? Job or Career First, let’s distinguish between a job and a career. A job is work you perform to earn money. It can be full- or part-time, and short- or long-term. A career, by contrast,
